(SPECIAL) The Almighty God admitted today in an exclusive interview with News From Doswell that Robbie Woods, the 9-year-old autistic boy lost in Doswell’s North Anna Battlefield Park last Sunday was a “handful” and that he required “24-hour love and protection” that eventually got him rescued Friday around 2 PM at the Martin-Marietta Rock Quarry.
“When Robbie ran off from his dad and brother on Sunday afternoon, I knew I was in for the long haul,” admitted the omnipotent being from his position in Heaven, “And I had to watch him like a hawk, because of the potential danger he was constantly in.”
God explained that from Sunday on “I had to first make sure he did not fall down the cliffs that separate the park from the South Anna River”, which at the time was slightly up and about 3-8 feet in depth. “And that park sometimes is inhabited by various wild animals that wander in from across the river or from the thick woods that surround the park,” requiring more intervention from the all-powerful ruler of the Christian world.
Later in the week God admitted he had to watch Robbie closely when he “crossed Verdon Road, because as anyone knows it is frequented by dump trucks coming and going from the quarry entrance”. Also, little Robbie had to cross the railroad tracks that run parallel along the road “since coal and gravel trains travel that section of track at all hours of the day and night”.
One inside the Martin-Marietta quarry, where Robbie was eventually found, God said he was “on my toes”, watching and guiding the young boy as he walked and played among deadly rock-crushing equipment, huge piles of rocks and a quarry pit “almost 400-feet deep” and full of stagnant water.
“It was constant,” God said, relaxing for a moment before going back to the next crisis somewhere in the world, “Robbie wandered through a 2-square-mile area virtually unscathed”, despite the presence of cliffs, animals, briars and other unmentionable dangers. “It was almost like that Popeye cartoon when Sweet Pea wandered into the factory. It was crazy, but I had a handle on him.”
Despite the presence of hundreds and hundreds of volunteers, state police and emergency personnel, Robbie managed to elude them all for almost 6 days. “I am pleased by the large number of people who volunteered to help with the search,” God said, “And I can’t tell you the number of prayers I have been besieged with since Sunday – the response has been simply overwhelming.”
Robbie was found about 2 PM Friday by a volunteer searcher in a fetal position in a creekbed inside the quarry property. He was taken to the VCU medial hospital in Richmond via helicopter, where he was reported in “serious but stable condition”.
“I’m thankful for the effort that went into finding Robbie,” God said. “Now if you will excuse me . . .”
With the rescue of Robbie, coupled with the closing weekend of Kings Dominion theme park, Doswell residents report there is “absolutely no reason to come to Doswell anymore”.
