After years of studying restroom graffiti Social Researcher and Blanton Road resident Joseph Wallo has concluded that the requests, statements and accusations written inside truck stop bathrooms are generally inaccurate, biased and simply not true.“After 7 years of research hanging around truck stop men’s rooms I can safely deduce that the graffiti statements are exaggerated by at least 98%,” stated Wallo. “The statements must be written by those harboring grudges against the inflicted parties.”
Wallo found that phone numbers linked to oral sex requests tended to be the least accurate. “Over the years I called dozens of phone number scribbled in stalls to ascertain if the party on the line did indeed provide oral sex services, as advertised. Less than one in 100 answered positively – most either hung up or answered most emphatically that those services were not available, and that the statement on the stall was erroneous.”
“I also found that on numerous instances that people who are accused of eating feces do not at all engage in that gastronomic activity. Wallo (left) said as he tapped residue from his Sherlock Holmes-style pipe. “And not only are the claims of various forms of illicit sexual activity unfounded, the accused reacted quite negatively to my probing questions regarding said activity, threatening harm to myself for simply asking the question. I assured them, it was strictly for research purposes, but it sometimes did little to assuage their anger. In fact, I believe many of them are still looking for me.”Wallo also debunked “with 100% certainty” one stubborn theory regarding those who insist on creating the graffiti. “My research has proven that after writing on the stall door or wall, the offending scribbler does not, in any circumstance, roll his waste material in little balls, as described by the old maxim. And in no case after reading said written statements, did I at any time consume those little balls of fecal material. That myth, how they say in television parlance, is busted.”
