A recent informal Doswell survey has revealed that when given a chance, most Doswell Teens fail to come up with any good band names.
“Spouting great band names is becoming a lost art,” says Richmond music writer Don Harrison, author of the book "Dancing Angry: a look back at Hostile Self-Expression During the late 20th Century". “In my day, given the chance, I could rattle off a couple dozen great band names at the either the drop of a hat, at a moment’s notice, without a second thought or off the top of my head. Teenagers today simply do not have the capacity to do that – it is a lost art. Stupid teenagers!” he added with a sneer.
Indeed, a follow-up survey of boomer parents revealed that prior to 1973, making great band name suggestions was as much a part of growing up as inflation, Pol Pot and odd-even gas lines. “Just the other day my son Ed asked me if I had any name suggestions for his band, a little pop combo composed of him and his three friends,” said Verdon Road resident Marvin Fishkill. “I rattled off a dozen or so before he said ‘OK, thanks but no thanks, Dad’. He just did not appreciate the talent, hard work and abilities that go into thinking up great band names as a youngster, then how easy it comes later in life.”
Some of the names suggested by Fishkill for his son’s combo include The Great Guitarmy & Navy Store, Tunnel Traffic, The Three Lads and Peggy, Candy Soup & Miracles, Synth and Synthability, Warsaw Convention, Robert Earl Huge, Eddie and the Loafer Lighteners, Fishkill on the James, Fishkill in China, Test Pattern & the Tones, Art Linkletter’s Keg Party, Fuzz and Static, Masterpiece Wrestling, Ham Salad and the Miracle Wimps and Dead Left of Center.
Also, Amish Electrical Fire, Pancake Breakfast Shootout, the Lennon Neighbors, Bookmobile from Hell, Kepone Salad, User’s Guide to Nothing, Zombie Church Supper, Bleed Between the Lines, An Actual Emergency, Three Peas and an Ed, The King Family Redux, Project Mohole, TV Science . . .
