Doswell Man Charges False Advertising Against Ruritan Pancake Breakfast
Doswell gastronome Eric Waldbauer is going head-to-head with the Doswell Ruritan pancake supper planners for what he considers false advertising.
“It’s not all-you-can-eat if they cut you off at 14 pancakes” claims the hearty Waldbauer, who says he suffered extreme humiliation at the supper when the server cut him off. “I just want the Ruritans to admit their supper was not really all-you-can-eat, since they cut me off at 14 pancakes.”
Ruritan supper planner Mark Gosline remarked that possibly Waldbauer would be more embarrassed at consuming even more pancakes, rather than from being cut off at 14. “The people sitting around him were astonished at the amount of food he was cramming down.” He says, “And it wasn’t just pancakes – he also had multiple servings of link sausages, endless potato cakes and cups of orange juice. My God, somebody sitting near him claimed he ate 23 link sausages. We should have cut him off of those too.”
Compounding the confusion was the fact that the meal was served, and not buffet style. “If they set up a buffet it wouldn’t have been a problem,” speculates Waldbauer. “I think their server was just lazy. All I’m saying is it’s not all-you-can-eat if they cut you off at 14 pancakes.”
“One, there’s too much waste at a buffet, and two, It wasn’t that his server was lazy at all,” counterpoints Gosline, a purple vein in his forehead fixin’ to bust, “It’s just that he had other tables to serve and bus, and Mr. Waldbauer was taking all his time with his petty requests. He would tap his finger on the edge of his cup and say ‘I need more juice’ even when his cup was still half-full. He would wave a half-eaten link sausage on his fork over his head to indicate he needed more sausages. He was too high-maintenance, and there were people waiting for his table, so we simply cut him off.”
Gosline did comment that they amend the signage for next year’s supper, thanks to the ruckus raised by Mr. Waldbauer. “I think the sign may say something like ‘All-you-can-eat pancakes up to a maximum of 14, thanks to Eric Waldbauer’.”
“I hope they get their act together next year.” Says Waldbauer, who is skeptical of the verbiage change. “In addition to the pancake situation, they had cheap, runny syrup, and the butter was too hard to spread evenly between the pancakes. And the juice tasted like Food Lion brand, not Tropicana. Things are going to have to greatly improve if they want Eric Waldbauer back.”
